This post is LONG overdue (and very long!) and I first want to appologize to all of my fellow doll artists that I have come to know and love. I let you down by not giving warning of this buyer sooner.
My name came up in the conversations regarding a recent situation between another doll artist and Karen Dudin which prompted me to "come clean".
My story began in March of 2011. I thought it was just an isolated case with just me and I decided to let it slide at that time. Unfortunately, I have come to find out that it was not an isolated case as other artists have had situations and have been affected by this buyer.
The best way to tell my story is to share the emails between the buyer, Karen Feagin Dudin and I. I won't be posting the mumbo-jumbo of the email addresses and all that, just the dates and the actual emails so that they are easy to read. They have not been edited in any way, I've not left any of them out and they will be in chronological order.
I decided to present it this way simply to show the conning nature of this client and to put to rest the statement that she is claiming that she asked me to take a doll back and refund her due to her sister being very ill. But that is not the entire story. She has left out how she began to ask me to take the doll back and refund her.
The doll in question is Josiah, an Angela Harris prototype "Jenna" sculpt to which Karen Dudin saw in person at IDEX 2011 and later purchased via my website:
Here is a copy of the PayPal transaction, leaving out the buyers address as I don't think that is necessary to reveal:
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Shipping
address - confirmed
Karen Dudin
United States
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Shipping
details
You haven’t added any shipping details.
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Description
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Unit price
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Qty
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Amount
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Josiah Reborn Baby Doll
Price with INSURED shipping: With US shipping
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$838.00 USD
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1
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$838.00 USD
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And now the emails starting with my first response to her purchase. I will make a few comments at the end of all of the emails:
3/4/11
Good
Morning Karen!
What a pleasant surprise to open up my email this morning and find that Josiah has found a
mommy! Thank you and bless you!
I am thrilled that Josiah will be joining your other beautiful
babies~what an honor. I will do my best to have him ready for the post lady
to pick up tomorrow morning, (it's my day off and our son is coming into town
from California) but if I can't get him ready, he will be on the way on Monday
for sure. I will let you know when he leaves here.
Thank you again and many hugs,
Debbie
3/4/11
It
will be an honor to have one of your babies! He is adorable and, so
realistic looking, and that gorgeous hair! One of my favorite names is
Josiah! I love all Biblical names. How do you ship your babies? I prefer USPS
Priority Mail. It takes only 3 days and, the truck arrives early in the
morning. Normally, It wouldn't matter but, we are having 14 people over for a
traditional pre-Lenten meal next Friday and, it would be
wonderful to have Josiah here.
Have
a wonderful day off and, enjoy you visit with your son!
Hugs~Karen
3/4/11
Hi Karen,
Thank you 
I think he will make you very happy. I also love Biblical names.
I ship USPS Priority with full insurance. OH...that means I HAVE to take
him to the PO on Monday as I can't get full insurance on line. (Oops, little
brain bubble~the other dolls I need to ship are within the insurance limits
online so I am printing their postage from home and having the post lady pick
them up, but that won't work for Josiah) Will that be okay? I know I
won't make it to the PO today. He should be there on Wednesday.
Sounds like you are going to have a houseful! That is wonderful.
Have a wonderful weekend!
3/4/11
Hi
Debbie, Sounds good. Can't wait to hold the little man 
Have
a good weekend too! Karen
3/7/11
Hi Karen,
Little boy Josiah is on his way! His Insurance # is VH 694 343 895
US This is not tracking but I can track him if I go to the PO with this
number (you can as well but if there is a problem I will surely do it.
I've not had a problem in 6 yrs so I'm not worried.)
Please let me know when he arrives and what you think of him
Hugs~
--
Debbie
They Never Grow Up Nursery
Where babies are babies...Forever!
3/7/11
Hi Debbie,
I am glad that baby Josiah is on his
way. I hope that he will get her before or on Friday! I will let you know
as soon as I have him in my arms!
Hugs~Karen
3/7/11
Hi Karen,
I am sure he will be there Wednesday or Thursday...but he should arrive
Wednesday.
Hugs
3/8/11
Hi Debbie,
Thank You for letting me know. I can't believe that I am getting
this little guy. I am so excited! He just captured my heart when I saw his
pictures. Can't wait to meet him in person! I will for sure let you know as
soon as he arrives. Oh...The Mohair that I bought from you was wonderful! I've
rooted one baby with it and, I will be starting another today. This will be my
third reborn. The painting, I have down to a science but, the rooting I still
need to work at. The two that I've done look really good but, I want this one
to look great! I am using a 40g 3 barbed needle. I am working on Kaya
now.
Hugs~Karen
3/9/11
Hi Debbie,
I received baby Josiah a few
minutes ago. I have to honestly tell you that, I am extremely disappointed with
him. I was expecting so much better for a baby costing over $800.00. My
daughter was here when he arrived and, she too did not think he is nearly
as nice as some of my other reborns costing as much or even less.
sadly,
Karen
Hello Karen,
I am very sorry to hear that you are disappointed with sweet Josiah.
What specifically is it that you are unhappy with about him?
Warm hugs,
Debbie
Hi Debbie,
He is nothing like I imagined him to be. He looks nothing like the
pictures that I saw of him. The way that he is painted does not add to any
kind of realism. Oh well, I took a chance on him. I just cannot love a reborn
like that. I will see if I can sell him to someone on DF. Maybe, I can recoupe
some of my money back that I paid for him.
Karen
Hi Karen,
I am sorry that you are disappointed. I provided large, very accurate,
clear pictures of Josiah.
You are my first disappointed customer in the 6+ years I've been
reborning.
You are, of course, free to sell him if you choose to do so. I'm sure
he'll find a good home where he is loved.
When you advertise him, please remember that he is one of only 3 of that kit
worldwide. Production of the kit never went beyond the three prototypes,
of which he is one.
Feel free to have your buyers inquire of me about him if they would like, I'd
be happy to answer any questions they have.
Hugs,
Debbie
3/10/11
Hi Debbie,
I am sorry too but, he looked much different in the pictures. I
never would have bought him if I knew he would look the way that he does.
That is a lot of money for a reborn that looks nothing like a real
baby.
I took a chance on him, believing that he was going to be a
beautiful realistic looking baby and he looks like an ordinary play doll.
I showed him to several people and, they all agreed that he was not nearly in
the same category as any of my other reborns.
I know that I am going to take a huge loss in trying to sell him
if, he even sells at all. I have never sold a reborn on ebay and, I hear that
resells never do well. I would not even know how to advertise him. I am
thinking that maybe, DF may be a better way to go. People know who you are and,
how you reborn your dolls. They also know a lot about the different kits.
I just wanted a new baby that I was truly happy with. My heart broke when I
opened the box yesterday afternoon after seeing him. Leo was also very unhappy
when he saw him. If, I don't sell him, it is an expensive lesson learned and, I
know of a 9 year old girl who would be very happy to receive him as an
Easter gift. Maybe, all is not lost and, I can sell one of my custom made dolls
that might give me a better chance of making my money back.
Enjoy your time away this weekend~Karen
3/12/11
Hi Debbie,
I just received the mohair and, it is gorgeous as usual!
I've used it on two reborns now and they look great.
I know that you are probably going to say no but, I am going to
ask anyway. Would you please consider taking baby Josiah back, so he can find a good home with someone who really loves
him.
I cannot deal with ebay and, my only other choice is to give him
away to a little girl. I am afraid at that age, she would not understand how
special these dolls are and not treat him properly.
I have no doubt that you would be able to find a good mommy for
him who can really love him. I am asking you from the bottom of my heart to
please consider this. I will be waiting for your reply.
Hugs~Karen
3/17/11
Hello Karen,
I'm sorry it took me so long to respond. I've been in and out of town for
the last 6 days and we've had a death in the family on top of it all.
So happy to hear that the mohair arrived and that you are happy with it.
Karen, I typically don't accept returns for many reasons but I do consider on a
case by case basis. I would first rather start with me helping you
sell him by posting some pictures up for you on your Doll Fan post. What
do you think of that?
Let me know,
Hugs
Debbie
Hi Debbie,
Someone on
Doll Fan put up a link for me so that they could see him on your blog. It's
been quite a while now and it seems that no one is interested. Could you please bend your heart in my case and
take him back?
I didn't want
to get into personal problems but, my twin sister is quite Ill and, I have to
fly to Vermont in two weeks to be with her. She is also is severe financial distress
and, I want to be able to help her some. There is a lot more to her problems
and, the refund for Josiah would be a Godsend.
I am so very
sorry for your loss.
Hugs~Karen
Hi Karen,
Yes I saw that link and thanked Lana for being so kind to help out, but links
on forums simply do not work to sell dolls. People want to see the doll
the moment they open up the post. I will post some pictures there for
you. You will need to go back to the post and edit in the title/subject
that pictures are added as I cannot edit your original post. Here is the
updated post with pictures. My posting bumped up your post to the top of
the page so that will bring new lookers.
http://www.doll-fan.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=248841
Karen, I am very sure of my work and I, as well as my dolls, are very well
known in the reborn industry. I did not misrepresent Josiah
in any way, have never had an issue with any of my dolls in the 6+ years I've
been reborning and feel that this is the best I can do for you. I am very
sorry for your struggles and will keep you and your family in my prayers.
All my best,
Debbie
Thank You,
anyway Debbie.
God
Bless~Karen
3/17/11
Debbie, I was
so hoping that you would take Josiah back for the price
that I paid for him. My sister has been a factory worker for over 20 years. She
works seven days a week plus over time just to keep a roof over her head. She
gets on the average 4 hours of sleep. The long hours and, heavy lifting has
taken it's toll on her body. She was in the hospital last week in agonizing
pain. They found that she has 5 fractured ribs and, a herniated Disc. Her
husband left her 5 years ago. She cannot go back to work for at least 3 months
if, ever. I was hoping that you would have a little compassion and help me to
help my sister by taking Josiah back. I have already sold
my engagement ring and a diamond tennis bracelet. What I got for them was an
insult but, still, it was something. The money that I paid for Josiah
would have helped more then I can tell you. I was sure that as a believer, you
would have been a little more understanding. I would not have hesitated for a
moment if, someone had asked the same of me. I guess that we are two different
people. I am the one that will be praying for you!
3/18/11
Hi Debbie,
I am
sorry about the email that I wrote last night.
I am just
really scared for my sister with her health issues and, how she is going to pay
her rent to keep her apt. until, she can go back to work on "light"
duty. She sees a specialist next week.
Would you
consider taking Josiah back for $500.00?
I would never
be begging like this but, I am desperate right now. She has tons of unpaid
bills on top of everything else.
She is the
only family that I have left. Please help me so that, I can help her.
Blessings~Karen
3/18/11
(sent out through my email account to all of my customers)
Hello everyone,
Recently my reborn,
Josiah, sold to a lady I met at
IDEX. She has had some unfortunate circumstances come along and needs to
find him a new mommy. I am sending this email out as a courtesy to her.
Here is the link where she has him posted for sale. You would be
contacting her directly if you are interested in buying him:
http://www.doll-fan.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=248841
I have a full slide show of him on my website:
http://www.theynevergrowupnursery.com/recently-adopted.html
She is asking just $500 shipped for him which is an amazing deal on his
category of reborn.
Take care one and all!
--
Debbie
They Never Grow Up Nursery
Where babies are babies...Forever!
3/20/11
Karen, I typically don't accept returns for many reasons but I do
consider on a case by case basis.
What exactly do you mean by a case to case basis?
I told you that I did not like Josiah not to have to put
my personal problems on you. That was probably a stupid thing to do.
Extreme Stress and desperation I suppose.
However, now that I have told you the truth for why
I needed to return him, I cannot understand, what "case" would
you accept a return?
Once again, I am pleading with you Debbie to take Josiah back for a full refund. With God's help, things will get better
and, I will be able to own one of your beautiful babies!
In Christian Love,
Karen
Hi Debbie,
Thank You, for
helping me to try and sell Josiah on DF. I appreciate your help as, I could not
do this myself. I just pray that someone will want to be his new mommy really
soon.
Hugs~Karen
3/21/11
Hello Karen,
You are welcome. I also sent out an email to my customers and have him on
my website as well (with your Doll Fan post). I am praying for a new
mommy for him soon too.
Good luck!
Hugs,
Debbie
Hi Debbie,
I am going to
appeal to you one more time and, beg you to take Josiah back
for the original price I paid for him. My sister is back in the hospital for
pain control and, loosing her apt. at the same time. The money for Josiah
plus, added to the personal items that I've sold would be a great blessing
to me. I could have him in the mail today and be able to leave for Vermont next
week with enough money to pay some back rent and maybe, another two months. I
also need to pay for my air fare there and, a rental car for the ten days that
I am there. Can you please find it in your heart to do this for me and my
sister? I am at my witts end with worry.
Hugs~Karen
Hi Karen.
You need to stop this. I gave my answer and my answer stands, for very
valid reasons. I am doing much more than most would do under the
circumstances.
I am sorry that things are rough for your sister and I will continue to pray
for you and her. Have you considered having her come to live with you for
a while?
Hugs,
Debbie
Debbie, did
you not say that, there were some cases where you would take a baby back? I
just do not understand why you do not see this as one of those cases. There is
great need here! Why say what you cannot make good on?
My sister is
unable to travel in her condition and, needs to stay where here doctors are.
There are also times when ( like now) that she needs to go into the hospital
for a couple of days for pain control. Have you no Mercy? She is all that
I have left. I almost lost her twice in the past eight years.
I will not
bother you again.
Karen
5/2/11
Hi Debbie, I just want you to know that little Josiah has been
sold to Sally from DF. I lowered his price to $225.00. He really was a cutie. I
think that she will be very pleased with her new little bundle.
Take Care~Karen
So, HAVE I been conned by Karen Dudin?
NO, I have not because I did not allow her to con me.
I did not accept a return or refund her for the doll.
From the very beginning, I did not trust her original words to me.
I AM a compassionate person and I DID consider taking Josiah back but the stronger sense in me, my passion to keep people honest, over-rode the thought of accepting him back.
I could not allow her to twist things around. Had she told me from the beginning that her sister was in need, I would have understood and would have accepted him back with a full refund minus shipping. But to attack my workmanship and the integrity of my faith first was detestable to me. You don't do that to your fellow humans.
It is true that all a buyer has to to do on eBay is claim that the doll was not as described to receive a full refund (and many times, the buyer keeps the doll!) and I assumed the use of these words by Karen were meant to scare me and make me take the doll back without thinking.
But I do think and I do care about integrity.
Karen's words in two different emails ( "With God's help, things will get better
and, I will be able to own one of your beautiful babies!" and "He really was a cutie.") confirmed to me that I did the right thing in my case.
In the grand realm of things, this incident, although it had me frustrated for a few days, means not a whole lot of anything. I held my ground and moved forward.
I will, however, be sharing this post on doll forums and FaceBook in order to clear up any confusion that has come since my name has been mentioned.
Sharing my "story" earlier/sooner may or may not have prevented a recent situation with this buyer. I simply do not know, but it has confirmed to me to share even the little things in the future.
Whew, what a load off my chest!
Thanks for sitting through it with me.
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